Good Morning My Loves,
I was thinking about the importance of choosing the “right” relationships last night, and how they have the potential to fuel us with energy, strength, resilience, and creativity. How they are vital to our overall success and survival.
The Word of God says,
Proverbs 13:20 (ERV)
20 Be friends with those who are wise, and you will become wise. Choose fools to be your friends, and you will have trouble.
It’s important to understand that the “right” relationships are supportive, but they are also “truthful,” which can sometimes hurt. It is important to choose carefully those whom we want to let inside, and those whom we need to “keep out” of our core.
In this past season of teaching a series on “entitlement,” I often heard the voice of Mama Chalk saying, “Birds of a feather, flock together.” That’s so true. But that’s ALL BAD if the flock is “diseased,” or walking in “deception.”
The diseased and deceived will not influence you to achieve spiritual, relational, physical, or financial health. On the contrary, they will “help” you become more dishonoring, dysfunctional, lazy, and broke. Those are called “helping” friends that are NO HELP AT ALL!
These so-called "helping" friends are more interested in:
1. Being “happy” than “holy.” Sowing to the flesh, rather than the Spirit.
Happiness is the by-product of living a life of integrity, but it's not the main end-goal of true growth friends. They are able to go through times of suffering with joy, instead of choosing a moment of so-called "happiness" and sabotaging their character or bringing reproach to the name of Christ.
2. Being honored, rather than showing honor. They don’t submit to God, refuse accountability, and rebel against His established authority. They are diseased and dying because they have no “regard” for their HEAD. Never align your life with anyone that dishonors God or their pastor, or who tries to be God or their pastor. There is only “one” head. (Period)
When a baby or animal is born with “two” heads it’s called a “FREAK.” When born with “no head” it will not survive. The same goes for friends. If they have “no head,” they cannot truly lead you into health in any area of your life. Choose those who are submitted to Christ, and their pastor.
Colossians 2:19 (ERV)
19 They don’t keep themselves under the control of the head. Christ is the head, and the whole body depends on him. Because of Christ all the parts of the body care for each other and help each other. So the body is made stronger and held together as God causes it to grow.
3. Doing what feels good in the moment, rather than being disciplined and respected for doing hard things the right way.
Responsible people aka “growth friends” keep their word, even if it's hard. They do what they say they’ll do, the way they say they’ll do it, when they say they’ll do it. They expect you to do the same, and because of this, both parties ADVANCE!
These strong, supportive, whole, “growth friends” will:
-Influence you to grow through the things that have the potential to hold you back. Because they’re “growing” friends, at times you’ll experience “growing pains.”
-They won’t let you keep a negative victim or poverty mentality.
-They’ll cause you to challenge the status quo, and won’t let you settle for mediocrity.
-They may cut you with truth, but they’ll use that same Sword to destroy the enemy of your soul in prayer and support.
-They will NOT stab you in the back, but they will have your back!
-They will not help you “avoid reality,” but to “see and face reality.”
-They are friends that bring stability.
-They will often disrupt our tendency to be selfish and self-centered.
-They don’t just call us out, they call us UP! They call us to a life of honor, humility, consideration, empathy, and diligence.
When we treasure them, walk with them, and support them in return, we ADVANCE. Their successes become our successes, and visa versa. We help each other grow, not die.
Let’s choose our friends wisely. Let’s hang on to our “growth” friends. You can easily spot them, because they clearly have Christ as their “HEAD!”
I love you all! PV